five days to go

 

Hmm – so busy ranting about the STOLEN 'A board' [that made me SO cross! thieving is so disgusting. yes, chop off the hand] that I forgot to update The Worry List.

Worry 03: Delete [thud…]

The drive home from Gatwick was ok, as far as driving for hours on end in billowing [yes, 'billowing' – not 'normal', no that'd be too easy – but it least it wasn't freezing fog] FOG, tipping rain and pitch darkness goes. Traffic wasn't as heavy as I'd expected and the trip was uneventful [love that word] apart from the usual halfwits who can't drive even in daylight. So I had an early night after a lovely chat with the FH. So good to be home and see his little face. Yay!

Worry 04: Delete [another resounding thud]

This morning, up nice and early, unpacked, slapped the laptop into sync mode with the pc and raced off to have my bloods taken. Yay -the phlebotomist is also my GP's secretary. No exploding pumps or problems at all. It seems the veins in my right arm [only one lot of chemo went in that arm, which may have helped the veins – less mustard gas is possibly a good thing] are now recovering. So my blood is now en route in it's little tube to the lab for scrutiny. I'd quite like to see that lab. When my blood is there. So I can get my results immediately.

Yes, I need therapy. Anyway, the rest of the list:

Worry 02: under construction…well. what can one say?

Worry 05 [and Worry 01]: bah. I keep thinking I am dying. Full of cancer. Every ache or pain I become distraught. In my head. Here. I try to deal with that. I am sure I am gaining ground, even though sometimes the people around me seem to forget where I am...just one year out of chemo. I am not sure if the shock has worn off even now – although I am VERY good at ''appearing'' normal. Perhaps TOO good. Maybe sometimes I should collapse on the floor. Screaming. Just so people can see what's really going on in my head. But then again, that wouldn't be very professional; now would it??

2 minutes of your time to help Yoga Bear get a $25000 donation

Halle Tecco is the founder of Yoga Bear and she has been recognized as one of 10 L'Oreal 2009 Women of Worth honourees for her charitable work through Yoga Bear. Halle's nomination was selected from among nearly 2,500 applicants. Starting today, L'Oreal is opening an online voting period until November 24th. Each person can vote once for one Woman of Worth. If Halle receives the most online votes among the other 10 nominees, L'Oreal will donate $25,000 to Yoga Bear!
I am hoping you will please visit the website and consider voting for Halle. It costs nothing and no purchase of anything is required. One minute of your time to cast your one vote can make a difference in the lives of cancer survivors across the country! [in the United States].
Please follow vote HERE.

Yoga Bear is 100% volunteer and, although it operates on a very small budget, has touched the lives of more than 2,000 survivors in less than three years. The $25,000 donation would be our largest donation or grant since our inception and would allow Yoga Bear to expand our services and assist more survivors.

Halle Tecco
 

Thanks for your help and support!

i don't believe it! robbers in Torquay!

I happily published some bits and pieces about Aj's new business opening last week. In the post there is a photo of an 'A board'. Well, guess what? Since the shop opened, it took just ONE week for some cretin to actually steal it! It cost over £150.00 – plus design and artwork…and WHY would anyone steal it? Are they opening a shop of the same name and just couldn't afford their own? We could have loaned it to them had they asked…grr

If you see this A board anywhere, please ARREST it!! And also the person who stole it – whom, I might add, I am rather hoping will drop it on his toes and have to have foot casts for a month.

What kind of person does this kind of thing to a brand new business? I am sure I have lots of descriptive words that are suitable, but not publishable.

Mutter mutter.

one week to go

Seven more days and I have my next check up. Uff. That'd be Worry No: 01.

I have plenty of other things to worry about, but that’s the thing that keeps pushing it's scary little face to the forefront of my mind. It makes everything else seem quite irritating and gnat like.

Worry 02: I am quite keen to get a new contract sorted out here in Portugal - the 2 months notice period has come and gone, so ideally, if the company wish to renew it for another year we will resolve that before I return to the UK. That's in, and under consideration. If they don't I will need 4 hours to say goodbye to everyone. If they do renew, that will be one less thing to stress about.

Worry 03: Drive home late tomorrow night. I am always concerned at my tiredness level - Gatwick is three and a half hours drive. During rush hour. In the dark [and probably the rain] Oh joy.

Worry 04: I get home, unpack, go to sleep, jump up Thursday morning for work, then race to the GP to have my bloods taken. I still hate needles even after all the stabbing and prodding that's gone on over the last 2 years. But I have wised up and no longer allow this appointment to be made with a nurse - I much prefer the phlebotomist thanks. Pumps exploding off the needle and black and blue arms have taught me a lesson. My veins still suck [well, they lay low that's for sure] and need an expert to find them without everyone ending up looking rather pale. Not to mention feeling rather cross.

For the last few weeks I have had a horrendous cold and cough  [thankfully the cough is no longer forcing me to bend in half and the cold is gone] but I haven't wanted to ask for any antibiotics in case they affect my blood tests. Yes, I know…stupid. But there you go. So once I've had the blood drawn, if I am still coughing my guts up, I shall shoot off to the GP and get something for it.

Worry 05 [see Worry 01]: The Check Up…tadaaahh…why am I not used to this by now eh? Although I definitely feel less demented so far, there are still 7 days to go. Lots of time yet for mass hysteria. And I don't think I'll ever get used to it; maybe it is expecting too much to even try. It's like 'getting used to' being hit by a car - I suppose you probably just don't. Though I wouldn't like to have to prove that…

And last but not least - I haven't done ANY Christmas shopping at all! Useless! After Tuesdays check up and Wednesday's TV thing, that is going to be the order of business methinks. Although next Thursday night we're off out for a girly dinner, so it may have to wait until I recover from that…perhaps I'll simply grab Aj and abscond over Christmas? Now there's a thought…

not much thinking going on

I have 'forgotten' far too many things recently. Well, not recently – but generally since being chemo-ed. Some things were quite very serious but hopefully will be resolved. This memory thing plus the 'I can't prioritise or FINISH things' thing sucks. 'Constantly baling out water – but I still feel like I am going to sink'; that's me. And it's hard to explain – there are no 'good' reasons that make one forget, neglect or avoid doing IMPORTANT things. It's getting better – the book 'Your Brain after Chemo', has helped. What a relief – I am not the only person like this. There are a LOT of us. Maybe we should start a club, as our normal friends probably shouldn't have to put up with this crap.

Multi tasking now involves palpitations and lists. I am getting quite good at using Excel [there's a programme I detest!]. I need to be very organised or feel like I might scream.

Hardly surprising, with everything that's been going on. Aj has relocated his business. Relocating a tile shop involves masses of heavy lifting, so he has been at it from 7.30 in the morning until 8.00 at night for about 3 weeks. And dealing with all the legal side of it, banks, solicitors etc during the day [in between hauling pallet loads of tiles, stands and stuff] has been making him crazy. He has been mainly falling in the door every night, then almost straight to bed.

My evenings have been spent working on all the advertising, the website and signage. This weekend I was painting floors blue and carrying horrible hand boards about in an attempt at organisation of chaos. I hate painting floors. We are both exhausted. But today the new shop opened! Yay!

And the other good thing: I haven't had a second to think bad thoughts for weeks. Well, apart from the fact that this hideous cold I have had has now moved to my chest and I am worried about it becoming bronchitis. I am coughing myself awake at night. But drinking cough medicine and sitting upright seems to help.

On the the 14th we were supposed to have the swine flu shot – seems Aj has to have it too in order to avoid getting it and giving it to me. But we have been moved to the next batch, which no-one knows the arrival date of. Apparently they do the Swine Flu vaccination in batches of 500. They will send us an 'invitation'. Uh?

I got my GP to sign that form that gives cancer patients free prescriptions. Gotta reap some benefit from this horrific disease right? Still waiting for that to arrive.

In the meantime I am going to Portugal to work again. Need to leave at 5.30 in the morning. The day after I return I go for my bloods. On  the 17th November I have my next check up. On the 18th we are off to the SKY studio for yet another interview.  Then we are off to see Rodrigo Y Gabriela [something to look forward to – yay]. Then to Brighton to drink cocktails on my friends rather posh seafront veranda. Then the kids are down for the weekend…

Actually, now I come to think of it, no wonder I'm confused and forgetful. Roll on the Christmas break!

ow!!

Right – booked the bloods while I was malingering at the surgery – and had the flu jab, and I also have to have a 'swine flu jab' – eek! Haven't booked that yet, but no doubt I will. I really feel like a hypochondriac!

I was a tad fraught at the thought, as I understood that these jabs actually inject a bit of the flu virus into you. But apparently that's not so, its an antiviral. Whatever it is, my arm feels like it has been battered with a baseball bat!

I arrived at the surgery 10 minutes before my appointment, expecting it to be late. Ha! the surgery was like a party! Loads of people over 60 all rushing about chatting to one another, a table for the 'Alphington Friends' to sell tea and [OMG] Christmas puds…uff. I think I was the only person under 50 there. I certainly got some odd looks.

Anyway, I was in and out in 2 minutes, stab, blah, bye. Now I just have a sore arm, neck and back – it's a bit like a cholera and typhoid…hurts a lot, gives you a bad arm, but goes away quite quickly. I hope! Every other time I've had a flu jab I've had this, and nothing else, so lets hope it's the same this time!

off to the GP

well today was great! I toddled off to the GP at 6.00, Aj made me an appointment whilst I was in Portugal, as whilst I was there I had that massive panic attack, crying down the phone to my oncologists secretary. So off I went.

I really love my GP. Being that I am convinced that he saved my life with his speedy typing/phoning thing when I was in crisis last year, well, why wouldn't I?

He's a tad eccentric. Which I like. I am not exactly your average cancer patient, so we make  a good pair. He asks me how I am in a way that really means 'how are you'. He explains everything to me, no matter what I ask, right down to the minutiae. He's a boffin type dude. Love it. No fancy name though [no Le Pew here!] – just Dr Bradley. And he has sort of crazy hair. This helps me trust him. I have crazy hair to.

He has decided I need a flu jab. And a swine flu jab. Hmm. Oh well – can't be worse than the blood draws which I hate, so I am booked in.

Free House Cleaning for Women in Cancer Treatment

A clean home goes a long way towards transforming our spaces. For people experiencing cancer treatment, cleaning house can simply be too difficult, at a time when a healing environment is critically important. Thankfully there's a non-profit called Cleaning for a Reason...

Cleaning for a Reason is profiled in the current issue of the Angie's List magazine. Women who are currently in treatment for cancer are eligible for up to 4 free house cleaning sessions from a local cleaner. There are over 300 house cleaning businesses across the country that have enlisted to provide this service. For more information about how to qualify for this service, check out the Cleaning for a Reason website here.

And they are always looking to add more cleaning businesses to their ranks so if you hire a cleaning service, let them know about Cleaning for a Reason!

Image: Flickr member The Shopping Sherpa licensed under Creative Commons

check up time again…

why are we so nervous nearing the check up? we/I should be jumping for joy. It's just a confirmation that we are well. Right? No. It's a test to see if the cancer has come back.

The last few weeks I have been worrying a lot. When I initially asked Dr Hong HOW I would know if I had a recurrence, she said that I would probably have the same symptoms as I had in the first place. And that it would probably recur on my stomach IF it were to recur. Oh joy. They were hardly 'in your face' symptoms were they? A swollen tummy, a lump in my groin, extreme tiredness. Well, I have the extreme tiredness again, that's for sure. And it worries me. Plus, apart from being exhausted, I have a lot of strange pains in my stomach – these are apparently 'normal'. After massive surgery like I had, you get pains. Adhesions etc.

Whilst in Portugal I rang the oncologists secretary in tears – she said better to wait until your appointment. So, I will.

But normal?? What is that?? Tomorrow I have to phone and book myself in for my bloods. I should have done it today. But as usual, I leave the important things to last.

To my detriment.

this is so true…

smiling hurts!

this is amazing! It made my face ache from smiling, it's such a happy video – everyone should have a wedding like this!

fantastic! see the whole story here!

travelling and new friends

well. then we went to Stoke. Aaargh – what a nightmare. The trip is, on average, 3 hours, 3 and a 1/2 tops. We took nearly FIVE [yes, 5] hours to get there. Never saw so many crashes on one road! The M5 is jinxed right now. Avoid! The first was a 5 car pile up. Then a three car crash, then road works, then another crash, more road works…it was quite literally, TORTURE!! I think I was in first gear for three hours – eventually had to swap with Aj, as my knees were locking up. Uff.

Eventually we arrived, exhausted, to have a birthday dinner with the girls – Chinese take away! yesss. And chocolate cake [with candles] for Vicky and Aj [Vicky's birthday is the same week as her Dad's].

Aj and his girls:

Then on Saturday we went to put flowers on Aj's mothers grave. I don't mind visiting Clarice, but I always hate this. Confusing. I don't like the cemetery, I don't like what seeing all those graves does to my head. And I don't like walking across the graves either! I always come away from there thinking horrible things and feeling upset. Feeling as if I better sort out where and how I want to be buried / cremated whatever. Not my fave type of thoughts.

Whatever. In the afternoon Aj went to see his beloved football team play against West Ham. While he did that I went to visit a woman recently diagnosed with ovarian cancer. We got in touch through Ovacome. She was diagnosed in September, and had her first chemo last Monday. As I was going to be in the area, we thought it might be nice if we met. Maybe I could give her a bit of support and encouragement. I know that I really appreciated it when I met the girls I now know as friends after I was diagnosed. So, off I went.

I was so nervous. I worried about telling her too much, too little, or something that might really upset her. I tried to bring her some things that might help. I am not a qualified 'let me help you with cancer' person – or am I? We who have had cancer, we know it well. Maybe I am. And it was great! We talked and talked, so much that I forgot the time. Eventually she dropped me back – but I think we could have waffled on for another day. A very strong woman with the right attitude.

But it brought it all back, the scary bits, the things I have compartmentalised. The things I have 'forgotten' [not quite]. But that was good, as I am now in a position to realise how very lucky I am. In a year I am hoping that she will be where I am – a survivor and also a person who is able to 'put away' the worst bits. But first she has to get through those 'worst bits'. It's heartbreaking. But I did it, so anyone can.

It's nice to forget some things. Sometimes chemo brain is a blessing!

the interesting birthday

well, what a busy old life! I am [to quote Nat] a BAD blogger! Which is good. I have been doing a zillion things which I will précis here or bore you all to death.

Firstly, I was working in Portugal – Portugal is a wonderful place to be, lovely people, fabulous beaches, great food, cities to die for, but…CRAP internet! So. No blogging. It just gives me a headache thinking about it. But being there was great, sunny weather [I was actually at the beach, bikini, book and all], lovely food and of course my friends. Oh and a bit of work thrown in [unfortunate that!]

Then home again – the usual midnight flurry of dropping the hire car, Aj collecting me from Exeter Airport, home, sleep blah. The day after I got home was Aj's birthday, plus the Tern TV second interview now that SKY have decided to use me for their Real Lives programme. Tern [Lorraine and Malcolm] arrived at lunch time, and we did a 2 hour interview in our freezing dining room. I shall be blue on the telly. I don't care. If even ONE woman is diagnosed early by seeing this, I shall be delighted.

Then Aj arrived and we went off for lunch at the Poachers. Lorraine did a separate interview with Aj – poor Malcolm had to ask Aj to stop talking, as he became so distressed he was in tears and couldn't film. He said he was imagining what he would do if it were HIS wife. That was sort of reassuring, as it's nice to think we are working with people who actually care a bit. Eventually Malcolm got his head together and carried on filming. In the meantime I ate half the whitebait  hors de oeuvres!

They treated us to lunch and left. We spent the rest of the day chilling out. An interesting birthday for Aj for sure.

The interview:

sign the LIVESTRONG Action petition

Insurance companies are a pet hate of mine ever since being so brutally treated by SAGA when I told them about my diagnosis – they were so rude/thoughtless/horrible that I was in tears for hours after I spoke to them. Shame it's not NOW, as I would have A: coped far better, and B: abused them right back!!

 

So, I shudder to think what it must be like to have to deal with that day in, day out in the States. The fact that people in America can be left die just because they don't have insurance? Incredible!! Everyone in the UK is always whining about the NHS [whine away, but NOT in my hearing thanks] – but at least we have the assurance that no-one, ever, no matter who they are or how much money they have, will be turned away from a hospital if they are ill.

 

I still find this completely mind boggling, and actually, barbaric. Sign the petition below, lets help people in the States not be murdered by paper pushing, greedy insurance companies? Quite a good idea I'd say.

 

Lance Armstrong was denied insurance when he needed it most. Sign the petition and tell Congress that no one else should be.

Today is LIVESTRONG Day. Thirteen years ago today, my doctor told me I had advanced testicular cancer. What most people don’t know is that at the time, I didn’t have health insurance. In the following weeks, I received letter after letter from the insurance company refusing to pay for my treatment. I was fighting for my life - but also for the coverage that I desperately needed.

The legislation currently being debated in Congress is not just words on a page - for many cancer survivors, it’s a matter of life and death. Now, as this debate enters crunch time, I need your help to ensure that what happened to me doesn't happen to any other American:

http://www.livestrongaction.org/campaigns/healthcare

No matter what side of the healthcare debate you're on, I believe we can all agree on two things:

No American should be denied health insurance coverage because of pre-existing conditions.

No American should lose their insurance due to changes in health or employment.

Will you sign the LIVESTRONG Action petition to make sure any legislation includes these two critically important reforms? We’ll deliver these to Capitol Hill this month as the debate reaches its climax and make sure our voices are heard in the debate:

http://www.livestrongaction.org/campaigns/healthcare

When I received my diagnosis, I was between cycling contracts. My new insurer used the diagnosis as a reason to deny coverage after the new contract was signed. Fortunately, one of my sponsors intervened. At their insistence, I was added to their insurance company and was able to continue my life-saving treatment. If my sponsor, a powerful company, had not gone to bat for me, I may not have made it.

LIVESTRONG post – cancer – it's effects on my life

I promised my friend POD I would do a special post for LIVESTRONG day. And this is it. To be fair, it's a post that has been brewing and evolving [that means writing and then deleting to avoid the risk of sounding self pitying and grating – oh, and to avoid abusing people that piss me off!], as I have been having a 'cancer brain' type of week. Very irritating, as I have been obsessing about dying of this stupid, repulsive and repugnant disease. Hmm. Stupid. And a waste of time. But, hey ho, one year out of chemo, it seems this is normal. OOOO – goody!! I am normal! woop woop. Not.

Imagine this. A person sitting with their face in their hands. Crying. Bent over the keyboard, just trying to see the 'x'. That is me. Trying to remember when I was diagnosed. Chemo brain does that to you. It can be really crushing. I suppose it was the 30th January really – sound scan, you have a malignant mass. Thanks.

Anyway, back to the post – it is supposed to be about how cancer has affected my life. Well. No brainer there. Get cancer, life changes radically. Values change. Friends change. Thoughts change. Long term plans change. The resentment is unbelievable - once you've had cancer YOURSELF, life is totally different. It almost seems like we ought to be able to just have a holiday.  Take a long break. But of course we can't. We [like everyone else] have to work. We have to pay bills. We have to deal with everyday ins and outs. But it's hard, as we feel like our lives are short, and WHY should we have to bother with these things??

In the meantime, back at the ranch, I have a lot of confusions. Actually, since I had cancer, my life seems filled with confusing things that were never there before – maybe because before I had cancer I didn't dwell on thoughts of death or how I might die? I certainly didn't envisage a long and painful, undignified death.  I AVOIDED that. And I think I was right to. Why dwell on things that haven't happened to you? No reason at all.

Reasons for cancer brain week; reading [I can't sing, so I just read the words] hymns reminded me of death quite a lot. Plus one woman I talk to is obsessed with the fact that ovarian cancer is the ONE cancer that always comes back. This has made me think too much. What if it comes back? What if it tries to kill me? What if it DOES kill me?  What? Blah blah – what about Aj, I don't want to leave him alone - what about this that and the other? It's scary.

I haven't even CONSIDERED where I will be buried / thrown etc. But I must.

And I confuse myself further by feeling totally positive it won't come back one minute, then by thinking it already HAS the next. Aaargh!  I am reading Lance Armstrong's book 'It's not about the bike'. He went through this exact same thing. Once you are no longer doing something [like chemo] to kill the cancer, you seem to be at a loss. No action. Just wait and see if it recurs. The first year of remission is so complicated. And it's disturbing to have a mind that swings back and forth between one extreme and the other. This first year is chronic - a low grade terror infests your mind constantly, as the chance of recurrence is highest then.

And, this is the other confusion – should I keep talking to other women who have had OC? Am I simply wallowing in my own misery? Am I dragging it out? Two people [they do not have cancer] have both said that if I keep talking to women who have had the same thing as me, I shall never 'Get Over' my cancer [get over it? hahahaha – is that even a remote possibility??]. Neither of them were being mean – they were trying to help me. But I am frightened of being alone with my cancer. So now I don't know what to do.

Today I was told I am 'obsessed'. What?? Of course I am obsessed, obsessed with making sure other women know about ovarian cancer. Obsessed with spreading the word. Yes. But generally obsessed? no. I don't think so.

The group of women I am involved with are fantastic – we all understand one another, as we've all had the same thing – Ovarian Cancer [apart from one friend – she had cancer of a different type]. We swap tales, we swap knowledge. But, we talk about recipes and garden plants, children and hopes and dreams – sex and the lack of it, work, hair colour [of course! now that we HAVE hair]. We do not OBSESS about cancer. But right now, one of us is dying. And I understand that. It is a warning of the 'worst case' scenario. But, for others, it may seem I am dwelling on things I don't need to. But I dwell on those things anyway. Better to know the facts or live in blissful ignorance? I think the former.

It is a constant in my mind…the pain I have in my side – is it the cancer come back? Is it an adhesion [please let it be an adhesion!]. WHAT IS IT???!!! And the people I can talk to about this are the women who have the same thing. The women who are also sitting awake at night, wondering what the hell is going on in their bodies – the women who also have the exact same pain that I have. Why, why would I want to cut my connection with these women?? How would it help me to pretend I didn't have cancer? How would it help me to pretend I am a normal person who doesn't have to think they may die within five years. How would it help me to be alone with my thoughts? I don't think it would. It's not the same as 'knowing someone who has cancer' – THAT you can get away from, cosily in front of the fire, you can forget about them – not cruelly, but it's human nature to try to concentrate on the good things, which is what I always did. Before I had cancer.

So. Would it help me to be alone with my thoughts? I think not. I actually think I might go mad. I am not sure I will ever 'Get Over' my cancer. How depressing. Get over it?? Give me a break – it's always there like a childhood monster in the cupboard – but this time it's real.

So now I do know what to do. For now.

LIVESTRONG Day

LIVESTRONG Day - October 2, 2009 - is a global day of action to raise awareness about the fight against cancer. Sign up to host your own event and help reach the goal of 1000 events in communities across the world.

For those of us in the West Country, the nearest event is in Ivybridge, see here. Click on the yellow arrow near Plymouth. The rest of you, just put your postcode in, and you will find something. Next year, we will have an event in Devon for sure!

 

the wedding weekend….

well – we went to Wales last weekend. For a wedding. It was the third [and last] wedding of the Welsh Jones girls, Aj's nieces. And [once we got there, past a zillion bollards, two zillion speed cameras and a boat or two] we had a great time.

Here are the bride and groom.

This is the Twmpath!!

The bride leaving the reception

And here we are having breakfast at Verdis in the Mumbles the next day. Perfect weather for al fresco toast and coffee!

LIVE S T R O N G

I just signed the World Cancer Declaration - a major global push to pressure world leaders to act now on cancer.

Right now, Lance Armstrong is riding in the Tour de France and dedicating his ride to this cause. And after the race, he'll send these commitments to world leaders and pressure them to attend the World Cancer Summit in Dublin this August. It's our best chance to push for better treatment, more funding for cancer research and access to care for everyone around the world.
But if people like us don't stand up, these leaders won't pay attention. Will you sign the declaration? It only takes a moment and could make a huge difference: sign HERE.

While we've made tremendous progress in the fight against cancer, we still have a lot of work to do. By 2010 cancer will be the #1 killer in the world, and as you read this message millions are fighting the disease around the globe. We need our world leaders to take action now.
I took this action because I believe this crisis couldn't be more urgent. Will you join me? It only takes a moment. Please sign HERE.

Oh and all ye merry blog followers and friends, could you leave a 'comment' on here if you sign?  It would be fun to see how many signatures I can generate!  Oh, and that bit's free heh heh. THANKS!!

quote of the day

"I have met brave women who are exploring the outer edge of human possibility, with no history to guide them, and with a courage to make themselves vulnerable that I find moving beyond words."

Gloria Steinem

laughing and crying

I am still laughing about my friends blog to do with Punkin Farmers…it makes it difficult to concentrate on what I actually came here to blog about. Chuckling into the keyboard is not conducive to sensible thought. Heh heh. And she has beautiful photos too. Check it out. A really witty blog.

So, what was it? Ah yes, first, a report on the Hot Flash Rescue stuff – so far, no change that I have noticed, but to be fair I've only be using it for a few days and rather sporadically at that, as I keep forgetting to 'spray my inner thighs' [!], neck, chest and abdomen. By the time I remember to do all this spraying, I am dressed and all those bits are snuggled into warm clothing [it is now Autumn here – as far as I am concerned, it amounts to the same as winter – i.e.: I am always freezing]. Plus there's the lotion, and I am not sure if I will overdose if I use both? Turn into Ice Chick…the opposite of Hot Flash Chick?

So we will have to await events I'm afraid. I will try to concentrate more on the application! Perhaps I'll just spray it everywhere before I get out of bed in the morning!

Next I wanted you to see this. It really touched me. I don't think I really need to explain why, but I'll explain a bit of the story behind it. This woman, Sam, is amazing. She doesn't think she is, but a lot of we other women do – she climbs mountains and cycles miles and miles. She has a job, and she is on the board of directors for HERA Women's Cancer Foundation, a non-profit that raises funds for ovarian cancer research through a series of rock climbing events. And, best of all, she has beaten cancer twice. Oh, and I LOVE her Dragon tattoo [now buried under hair – yay!]. If I'd thought about it while I had no hair, I'd have copied it for sure. Very powerful.

Sam posted this on Facebook yesterday - I saw it and it made me smile from ear to ear, as I just thought "wow, how cool". Then I thought harder and just burst out crying. That horrible gulping crying - why? I don't know - maybe because I was touched that someone I have never 'met' thought to add me to a list of names that starts with someone I know is VERY important to her. So. Thanks.

Facebook Caption: My dream capsule message --"I'm climbing for Sean, Marilyn, Joyce, Beth, Carla, Wendy, Charolette, Tonya, and Sandhy."

And on a lighter note, here is that same crazy person – the tag is: "Hamming it up at C4L" – the tiny person hanging precariously off the mountain [far right] by one hand is Sam! Hamming it up hanging by a thread?? eek!

Sam, hope you don't mind me nicking your pics – couldn't help myself!