It's not about me

What a week. I went to my BNI meeting on Wednesday and after being unmercifully ragged about the YOU magazine article, one of the members blurted out privately to me that a friend of his had died that week of ovarian cancer - in one week! And just before her wedding.
I almost threw up in his lap. He was sitting next to me. Fortunately I didn't but it was a close call. My skin went cold - horrible. It was 7.00 in the morning! It turns out that the woman in question had had ovarian cancer 4 years back, and been in chemo ever since. Her story is here. It's tragic. But I was relieved when I read it - sad to say but I felt better knowing she hadn't been killed by this in only a week -  that would have been too much...

Other friends in the OC facebook group are going through hell. Rising CA 125's, CT scans...random things that are scary to say the least. They are my friends. It's hard to read their messages and not want to jump or a plane or train and go and see them...sadly, it's not possible. And it's hard to deal with. I just want them all to be well. Or at the very least, to achieve remission for some time.

And that's the worst thing - some women never get into remission. That so sucks!! And that's why I am so concerned with raising funds for research!

I get the impression that some people have the idea that I am 'self aggrandising' with all this 'Awareness' stuff [radio, TV, newspaper etc] - just for them/you to know; I would rather have never ever been heard of by anyone than have had cancer.

But as I HAVE had it, and as it may kill me eventually, I WILL take every opportunity to raise awareness, and I WILL try to get it out there as much as I can. Think what you want - as long as there's a chance of even ONE woman being saved/warned/woken up - I will be there.
This is not about 'me' - this is about what I can do to help by being out there. And I am simply trying my best to do just that. Things like live TV terrify me - but I will do it, because an ordinary person like me could just make someone think that 'one' thought that may save her life. 
I hope to help women like me - women who have no IDEA about this insidious disease. Women who could survive a diagnosis if they get diagnosed early enough.

So, no, it's not about me - it's about being AWARE!!