friends doing stuff…

See this article online about my friend Annabelle! Or read below. I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw her in the Mirror online…looking stunning as always :) Go Annie!

"The dress may look familiar, but the brunette modelling it is new.

And while Kate Middleton is likely to hang on to the Issa dress she wore to announce her engagement to Prince William, Annabel Titmuss – who won exactly the same dress in our ­competition – won’t be holding on to hers. ­

Annabel would love to keep it, but she’s ­planning to put it up for auction to raise funds for the charity that supported her in her battle with ovarian cancer three years ago.

“I absolutely love the dress,” says Annabel, who at 29 is the same age as Kate and ­William. “It’s gorgeous and very classy.

“I really enjoyed modelling it for the picture. It’s really flattering and I think it would suit most body shapes. But selling it is my way of saying thank you to Ovacome, who helped me so much when I was ill.”

Annabel, a nurse who lives in Crewe, was just 26 when she was diagnosed.

“My husband James and I had been trying for a baby for some time and nothing was happening so I went for some tests.

“It was during the fertility ­examinations that they found the cancer.”

Annabel had to have a full ­hysterectomy and her ovaries were removed. She then had to undergo six months of chemotherapy. Happily she has now been in ­remission for two and a half years.

“I couldn’t have won the dress at a better time as it’s actually Ovarian ­Cancer Awareness Month, and Ovacome are in the process of setting up a support group for younger women,” she said.

“Ovarian cancer is more common in older women who have had their families, but when you are diagnosed young, as I was, there is obviously the issue of infertility.”

Annabel plans to auction the dress online on eBay, hoping to raise some much-needed funds to help the charity.

“I am so glad I entered this competition. I love Kate’s style – and I really like Kate and William as a couple.”

melancholy

Just thinking thinking thinking this evening. I've been far too tired recently. And although I have a ton of work to do, I decided to have break and just listen to some music, play some games and generally have a skive this evening. Glass of wine, Sennheisers, fags – jammies. Lovely!

Listening to the White Album…it's always going to be, and always has been, so evocative of Dad's reel to reel tape of the Beatles -

…memories of David as a baby, trundling about in a pair of terry towelling pants and a suntan cutting his teeth on empty beer cans [perfect childhood!], this photo will shock and horrify most modern mums…so funny! And so harmless..

Remembering walking to school in HOT rain in Papua New Guinea with Pete. Pete was always such a stick insect :) Pete on the left.

Mum under our house on stilts, buying fruit or carvings from the locals, who were mostly naked. And happily for us, we found this perfectly acceptable. This chap not so – he wears the sarong that normal people wore before David Beckham made it such a bore.

Mud that dried to look like broken Easter eggs – it always fascinated me as a child. Still does.

Blissful days at the beach, where the sea was warm and only about a foot deep for ages, then suddenly VERY deep and cold…floating about in massive inner tubes from the huge Mac trucks used on the mines. The sand was soft – this is one of my favourite photos of all time…

And Mum always made iced coffee – that's a surprise memory. Just recalled it. Odd how there are things in the mind hiding away. Then they suddenly surface when you don't expect it. Picnic. Iced coffee. Sun. Sand. Happiness. The hot car.

Losing our flip flops when we had to cross the river to go to school, as the mud was so gluey. Worrying about hook worm?! Mum and I had matching dresses – made by Mum's best friend Kay. I remember the colour. Blue. My favourite. I felt so important to look just like Mum. HUGE steaks cooked by Kay's husband, our adorable 'uncle' Ralph…which apparently 'fell off the back of a truck'. Heh heh. The 'Bloody Red Baron' tape. My 'best' friend Tamara. Her surname escapes me for the moment.

-

No-one else can ever know what is going on in your mind. They can never understand how you feel unless they ask – or you tell them. Therefore it's easy to assume that nothing is happening in there that's too serious. This lays one open for accusation.

Sadness is hard to share.

When someone asks you how you are, you don't TELL them do you? Well, unless you really are ok all the time? And if you do tell them, as in: "how are you?" - "oh, terrible, I feel ghastly / sad/ ill etc" – the face!! Like, ''what? You are seriously NOT going to really tell me how you are are you?'' Society dictates NOT…

So I am walking around with this big big heartbreak inside me. And when people ask how I am, of course I tell them I am fine, thank you. Or risk a strait jacket for my pains.

I am still so sad about my Dad. My heart breaks for my mum. Yesterday would have been their 50th wedding anniversary. I hope to see my twentieth. And thirtieth – we saw our tenth last year…to see our 50th I'd be 88. Well, bring it on! I shall hopefully have a blue rinse, the FH a grade 2.

Happy anniversary for yesterday Mum and Dad. I am so sorry you aren't together for this one.

more fund raising!

Well, the Golf Day went swimmingly! Julie did everything! All I had to do was design the poster and the prize vouchers, and I got ONE prize for the golfers. Not a great deal of effort on my part, and for that Julie raised £850.50 [love that .50p bit].

Fingle Glen were very generous with a gigantic bacon butty on arrival and a buffet dinner [beef curry, chicken curry, chips, rice etc] for which Julie gave them a percentage of the days take. Sundry other people donated loads of raffle prizes, and popped down after the event if they hadn’t been there, for a drink and the raffle.

I think Julie spent about a week on the phone arranging all the other prizes, golf days, weekend breaks, TONS of prizes for the raffle, the longest putt [is it putt?], the overall winners, the people who came second etc. The working out of those winners seemed like a right nightmare – Julie was at it for ages, so if you do one of these events, get an expert like her involved!

And, there was wine, designer golf hats, sports shirts, books, you name it, she had it. The winners were delighted, as they went off with loads of swag. I was working all day, so the FH went down and spent his day off helping Julie – the highlight of his day was racing about in the golf cart getting beers to the players ;)

Someone asked me how it all worked, as they want to do one too. Not having personally organised it, I am hoping I am correct in the following. Each person paid £25 [they had to raise a team of 4] for golf, bacon butty and buffet meal after. The T-offs were staggered throughout the day.  Julie sold each team a balloon [and I am not quite sure of the details here, as I don’t understand golf at all]. The balloon could be let go if you wanted to retake your shot I believe. Some of the Fingle girls with their balloon.

She also imposed fines of £2.00 and £5.00 on people who did naughty stuff on the course. One chap was fined a fiver for being scruffy and mistaking the herb bread for ‘mouldy’ bread in a rather loud voice heh heh. In advance of the event, Julie sold raffle tickets, and four lots of Fitness First vouchers that they kindly donated. During the day she was there making sure everyone went off ok and organising drinks etc. for the players.

Judi Spiers came to help with the raffle and a little auction; people were very generous with raffle prizes and donated so much. All the people who came spent a fortune. So, a fabulous result all round!

My effort – appearing at the end and saying thanks! Then racing off to work at the Port Royal whilst Julie raced off home for a well deserved feet up! Oh, but not after letting a few people know that there may be another one in September…Teign Valley have offered to allow us to stage one there, but we’ll see how gluttonous for punishment we're feeling by then!

Here's the girl herself. Thanks Julie! And everyone who gave their support!

life

I am having a fab one! Knowing that one may die earlier than expected is a great contributor to enjoying the moment. And I do – enjoy every moment. I have been told I am selfish. I have been told I am nasty – cruel even. I’ve been told I am all sorts of things.

But I know I am not. Well, I am never intentionally nasty. I am forgetful – perhaps this seems selfish? I am outspoken – maybe this is seen as cruel?

I don’t know…and to be honest, I no longer care. Life is too short after a cancer diagnosis to actually give a f*%k. Bring on the people who love me as I am. The others…well, take the back seat.

I am scarred. I am weak. I have less hair than I had before chemo. I am now a worrier, where I wasn't before. I concern myself with awareness of ovarian cancer…gosh, I am such a bore!

But hell, life is good! I have lots of freelance work, I have a home – I have a wonderful husband. I am strong enough now to do work of any kind. And I am grateful for that.

This is one of the most enjoyable pieces of work I did this week. This woman has raised £30000 this last year -  have you thought about doing some serious fund raising events? They are very satisfying. It takes tons of planning and nagging and running around. One of my friends raised £8000 in one night with a dinner and auction event. Try it!

fffft!

I am bloody exhausted! I want someone, somewhere, to just give me a break.