This evening I have a face awash with tears. And I am filled with rage and sadness. I keep looking up at the ceiling – just to feel that wrench in the front of my neck – just to feel still alive. And to try to be calm and stop this crying. I have had the most horrible few weeks. I think.
Oh! Actually. No, I haven't; actually, I haven't at all. I just thought I had. But really one of my friends has. She is ill. Extremely ill. My week was simply filled with worry about her and her family and sundry other [quite unimportant somehow] stuff.
She is suffering. But she is a tiger. A fighter. A wonderful woman, intelligent, beautiful and interesting to know. She has three lovely daughters whom I've heard a lot about from her – all good things. I met them once. They are admirable. And beautiful too. She adores them, each one for their own individualities. And a sweet husband, equally loved – he has been amazing in his support according to her - and with the same name as my FH. Odd.
My friend has the orange top on in the photo. And the blue nails. Blue? Heh heh. She is in such a hard place right now. Sometimes it's hard to know what to do, what to say…so, just think of my friend please? It might help.
Sometimes there are just no words except that I am thinking of you and of her.
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