a bit of excitement – thanks to FORCE

Tuesday 24th June


Surprise!! Today was good fun! Started work at 6.30 am – more about that in a minute...and took 2 hours in the afternoon to go to the ‘Look Good, Feel Better’ session. I REALLY did not want to go. I couldn’t bear the thought of having to meet lots of strangers and try to be normal. But, as the places are so limited, if I didn’t go, that would mean I was being selfish, as someone else could have had my place. So, at 1.45, I shot off in the car, paid the astronomical parking fee [£2.80 for 3 hours!! Greedy little beasts!] and tootled into Force to see what was what.

Go here: force

Force is fantastic! It’s like visiting your rellies – everyone is so friendly and relaxed and relaxing. It’s a real little haven from the chaos of cancer. Anyway, we all trundled in, most of us girls looking rather nervous [I think half of us had been thinking ‘I don’t want to go’]. We each got a little name tag and a coffee – sat round the table and from then on we were treated like we were really special. The Force ladies bring coffee and biscuits [you WILL eat choccie biccies – love ‘em!]; the cosmetics girls from Dingles brought a ‘Treat Bag’ for each person. That is totally cool – it’s filled with cosmetics and perfume, and you get to take them all home after being shown how to use them. I have worn make-up for years, and didn’t think I needed any lessons on how to use it, but I was in for a surprise. They show you how to cleanse, tone, apply light foundation and eye make up and even [this was the best for me!] how to draw in your eyebrows. I was the test monkey for the eyebrows, and it was amazing how a little can do a lot – I was struggling with that, as I kept putting too much eye pencil - now I know how to do it properly. Great!

Honestly, all those women volunteer for this, and they are fabulous. So, so cool! Thank you very much!! The only thing I would say that could make the afternoon any better would be that everyone goes off to a cafe and has coffee together after – as the 2 hours draw to a close, everyone is starting to relax and chat with one another, then it’s time to go. I think it would be very useful to have more time together as a group, to do a bit of ‘networking’ and make new friends. But apart from that it was brilliant.

So, the reason I was working at 6.30 in the morning. NO SLEEP!! Grr – the 3rd week is the best as far as being past all the stupid side effects, but it’s the worst for sleeping. I am getting worse and worse with regard to insomnia. I had a total of 3 hours sleep last night, and even that was rubbish sleep. I was dreaming that I was with friends and one of them pulled my wig off! oooooo dear! Subliminal chaos...

Plus the fatigue is getting worse every time – I am very concerned about it for the next two – I have work to do, and sometimes it’s hard. But at least I am lucky that I have a little leeway – if I need to I can work at midnight or dawn.

Today I had yet another interesting side effect – a big fat swollen foot! Oh Joy! My toes looked rather like sausages, and my ankle was definitely not the Victorian ideal. Rang the Resident Mazza Nurse who has herself just undergone a hysterectomy – but she seems to have had a ‘hysterical-ectomy’, as she is like a bouncy bouncy thing right now! I am so chuffed for her that I can’t explain - she had a dreadful time for ages, but now she’s like a mad cat again - fantastic. She said if I keep it elevated it should be fine, and if it’s not down tomorrow, to ring the ward. So, did the elevation thing and I now have an ankle again, but will be seeing this in the morning. Seems ok right now. But Oh Dear – tired?! I feel like every single part of me is made of lead.

Oops – forgot – SUNBATHING!! Next bit of the blog! Oh I bet you are just holding your breath right?? heh heh....