Frenzied plans and feeling jumpy

22 July 2009

On Sunday I arrived in Portugal for a weeks work. This is a normal event and was planned well in advance. But I had no plans to return in August, as August is the month that the tile industry 'goes to sleep'. Usually most of the staff is on holiday, the kilns are shut down for maintenance and there is a skeleton staff running the factory. We tend to try to get ourselves organised which usually involves deleting and filing zillions of things that seem to get all over our computers and desks during the preceding months.

But this year, it seems I need to be here [Portugal] in August. But unfortunately I have already made plans and with only two weeks notice it is not possible to change all of them, and difficult to change some of them. The plans are all on the weekends apart from one weekend, which is the week of my 4 monthly check-up [SHRIEK!!] on the 11th.

The other weekends all involve people arriving and staying at the house. They have booked holiday or bought train tickets, bus tickets etc. and there is no way I can change those dates without letting a lot of people down. And I don't want to anyway. Miss the ''Annual Famous For Hangovers Cocktail Party''? I don’t think so!

So the only remaining thing I COULD change was my oncology appointment . That would free up the week of the 9th to the 15th so that I could come to Portugal [unfortunately the flights are Sunday to Sunday or you walk].

Uff - NOT something I particularly wanted to do, as I didn't want to make it any later, and so far I hadn't been thinking about it too much. It was, after all, 'weeks away'. But I had to at least try to free one week in August, and that was the only solution. So I rang the oncology department. They wanted to know why I needed to change it, so I explained. The woman I spoke to was so kind! She found an appointment 2 weeks AFTER my current one, and when I said I would get far too anxious waiting longer and may end up in prison for some violent crime, she seemed to think that was quite normal and acceptable, and hunted about further. Whilst all this was going on I was feeling sick and panicked. I didn't want to even think about that appointment right then, let alone phone up and change it. I was sort of hoping it would be impossible.

After some rummaging, viola! She came up with an appointment on the 28th July. Yay!! I think…Ok - but what about my bloods? I am supposed to have them done a week before, and I am in Portugal right now, so that's impossible. Nice Oncology Person said not to worry about that, just get myself down to the outpatients on Monday, they will do the bloods and process them for Tuesdays appointment. So, the plan is now to get home at 12.30 on Sunday night from Portugal. Jump up Monday morning and race to the Outpatients in order to get seen as soon as possible - I don't fancy sitting there for hours, as the girl are down Monday and I want to see them before they go home. Then Tuesday, The Dreaded Check-up!!

All rather rushed and making me jumpy. After I finished reorganising the appointment I was completely drained.

The good things about this are:
I have hardly any time to worry about the check-up
I am here with Julie, [she’s on holiday!] and her appointment is the same day, half an hour before mine, so we can worry together
Aj doesn’t have to put up with the Post Check-up Panics and Touchy Behaviour :o)
The sooner it’s done, the sooner I will know I am cancer free for another four months

The bad things are:
I AM STRESSED ABOUT THIS AS USUAL!!!

Better for everyone to stay out of my face this week that's for sure. I am head down and working in the day, and chilling out with Julie in the evening, and Aj checking up on me by phone. Roll on Tuesday evening when we shall all be at the pub celebrating!

In the meantime, I am in a bad mood. And nervous. And pleased that this time next week it'll be done for another 4 months.

I hope.