Saturday, 16 January 2010


this week a friend asked me why I blog in the 'middle of the night'. I said because it helps me. To sleep. To be calm.  She sounded sceptical and suggested listening to audio books. I have tried them – they make me insane. But it was a nice question – it made me feel she cared. I know she  does.

I didn't go into the technicalities. But her question did make me think. Why DO I blog so late?? And having thought about it – I blog so late because it keeps away the nightmares. It empties my mind into to the virtual world, so that I can have at least a little sleep.

Insomnia is horrible. But, as a side effect of having had cancer; not unmanageable – better to be awake half the night than to be dead. But frustrating nonetheless. Audio books could be the answer – but the readers all seem to have such aggravating voices – I prefer to read to myself. And I do. A lot. Eventually ones eyes become so tired that one has to sleep – only to awake 1 hour later…it is shocking – you think you've been sleep for hours. But you haven't. I wake up on a 2 hour basis. It sucks. Sometimes I go downstairs for a cigarette. Sometimes, not. I read. I drink lots of water. I think too much.

I blog.


  1. Blogging late isn't unusual for me. Once a week I am up every two hours don't know why that happens. Maybe it is the tea I have around 9pm. One night I got up at 3 am came into the kitchen and started to organize my junk drawer. Blogging is quieter.

    BTW , I like your description of your laproscopic surgery.

  2. yep- I am right with you on this one. I have suffered insomnia since I had my surgery but it doesn't worry me anymore and now I am relaxed about not sleeping it doesn't have that much impact on me. If I get nasty thoughts I play with my iphone under the covers and water my Fairyland Garden on facebook!!

  3. haha! Thank goodness for the virtual world eh Jo? And I love my iPhone - email at 3.30 in the morning...

    And you're right Dee, blogging is nice and quiet. I have one of those drawers that is very tempting at the oddest times!

  4. My nights range from hourly "wake-ups" to "sleep soundly". I don't know the why of either. And oddly, I can stay up till 1:00 AM and not seem to suffer the next day from sleepiness. Weird.

  5. Hi Sandhy...I too have a difficult time with readers' voices in audiobooks. I've been following a thread on amazon for months that I find somewhat helpful.

    However, I suspect that many of these comments are from an American English perspective?

    BTW I'm also a big fan of nighttime teas such as Organic Nighty Night and Good Earth Good Night tea.

  6. Huggss. I have insomnia too. It's much better with the time release melatonin now. Sleeping pills never worked for me.

    I feel for you! Although you are been through so much more than I. So in ways I just have to listen to you and try to feel for you.

  7. thank you! I am sure you can probably imagine very well.
    Interesting about the melatonin - I shall ask my GP about it. Thanks!


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